SOME DAYS ARE MORE OF A STRUGGLE THAN OTHERS.
A reminder to self: I am here to learn, to grow, to change, to love and to be loved. Staying comfortable was never the intent. If this is true my restless Soul and I know it is, how long until you join together with my Spirit? My Body needs your participation to be who we are meant to be.
Some days are more of a struggle than others. It seems that I have had a group of “those days” recently. In my heart I know it is for no other reason than that I am simply not following my inner nature. I am not getting up early for alone time to meditate and be quiet. I am allowing random chatter within. Self-defeating chatter like – “you always do this start stop thing. You can never stay with it. You’re getting old. You’re not a good father. Who am I kidding?”
This shit is destructive and as long as we allow it to prevail we will be held back. There is no more powerful opponent than my own mind and no greater teacher than my own experience. Having said this and knowing its true does not mean we will follow the logical path of filling our minds with good things. What it means is that we have learned enough to know that we choose the words to write down which creates our story. We choose the colors and the brushes to paint what our experience will be. We are the creators of our world. Even when it seems we are out of control we still have a choice to decide how to handle what is put in our path.
There is nothing greater than knowing who we are. I know who I am when I’m still. When I am silent, I am with God, aware that I come from God. I am God. There is nothing worse after tasting Eternity and aliveness then to only see and experience what our physical eyes see and our mind can comprehend. It is dead and a dead end. We are Spirits passing through this life in a temporary body. We are much more than what’s on the surface.
I have spent a lot of time trying to figure out why I do this and why I do that. Although I think it’s important to take time to figure it out. I think the ultimate question for me is how I continue to move forward. The answer is not easy. It requires courage and passion and a willingness to be vulnerable. These are not things that are talked about much in today’s world. There are not a lot of people who are championing courage or vulnerability, but we need them more than ever. I need it more than ever. I am talking about not being perfect and being OK with not having all of the answers. We all can say that nobody’s perfect but when we come close to our own sore spots – the things that make us uncomfortable, it’s a different story. Stay away! But we are here to grow – not stay static. We all go through change and although I do not always feel like it I know that Change has my best interest in mind.
So, Keep believing. Keep following your heart. Notice what you’re attracted to and if it makes you feel good and alive, follow it! Take some quiet time every day for yourself. Even if you think you’re to be busy. Pay attention to the chatter in your mind. If the conversation is not supporting you then change the conversation. Be patient with yourself. Keep it simple. Share your story with someone. Don’t underestimate the power of a friend.
Lastly, intentionally smile at someone that you do not know with no other intention than to make them feel good. It will make you feel good too.